Ever had one of those moments when you felt like you had done and see all this before, and everything was happening all over again? Luckily, I had such a moment last night. But unlike a typical déjà vu moment, I knew exactly when and where I had last experienced it.
I attended the first rehearsal for the San Francisco Bay Area Rainbow Symphony last night after a week apprehension due to the difficulty of the pieces we will be performing. I don't know which skill I have retained more - two years of learning the cello, four years removed; or ten years of the violin, fifteen years ago. Finally, I chose the cello since that is the instrument I prefer to play at this moment.
When 7:30 pm arrived last night and the group of about 50 musicians gathered, all the sensations and sentiments came flooding back. It wasn't that I could recall a specific memory from six years of orchestra during high school and college, it was simply the tingling in my heart when the concert master signalled the oboist to play an A note for tuning. The familiarity continued with the conductor's very first downbeat of the evening and even the occasional (okay, fine, maybe frequent) dissonance of pitch as we struggled to sight read masterpieces by Schubert and Mendelssohn.
The entire experience was almost surreal, and despite stumbling through many parts that moved too quickly for my skills, I knew I had rediscovered something that I had missed for a very long time.
At the end of two and a half hours, my neck was stiff from tilting it at an odd angle to read the music and my arms were aching from repeatedly jumping from the low C to the high A with the bow, but my heart and mind soared beyond the high A like a kite in blistering winds and couldn't be coaxed down even late at night as I lay in bed.
Now, a day later, returning to work has brought me down to cloud seven. I can't wait until next Wednesday when the symphony meets again.
I just have to practice, practice, practice...
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Thursday, July 3, 2008
waking up from reality
Was I really in Paris, or was it all a dream?
It has been exactly one month since I returned from Paris to San Francisco, and already it feels like months ago when I was in the city of "metro, boulot, dodo" (metro, work, sleep). Every now and then I wonder if I actually lived in Paris for two months, had pastries for breakfast nearly everyday, explored the streets of Paris with a camera and an absorbing mind, and travelled to the Provence and the Alps for some unforgettable adventures.
I questioned this particularly when I got on the scale upon my return and realized I lost five pounds while in Paris. Yes, recognize your jealousy and move on. But losing five pounds after two months of French dining, pastries, and ice cream! Must have been all that walking.
The way I see it, Paris was really a launching pad for the next phase. The little gray cells began to churn, and daydreams began to mix with reality. One of the things that happened during my last week in Paris has led to an exciting new project which will commence in one week.
The one thing that I miss the most of all the activities that I used to do when younger is performing in a music ensemble. This may come as a surprise to some, but there is a performer inside of me that's waiting to leap out and prance about on any stage to relive the old days of orchestras, marching bands, and choruses. On one of my last days in Paris, I saw a flyer for a concert by the Paris Rainbow Symphony Orchestra. I thought it would be fun to attend, especially since they were playing some great pieces, but unfortunately the concert had already happened the night before. Disappointed, I scanned down to the bottom of the flyer where I saw the words "in affiliation with the San Francisco Bay Area Rainbow Symphony." Now that was a surprise. I didn't even know that such a symphony existed in Frisco!
As soon as I returned to SF on June 3, I searched online for the ensemble. To my delight, their very first concert was going to be June 8 at 7 pm. The timing was perfect! I'll go to the concert, check them out, then join them to unleash the performer in me that has been dormant for the past 15 years. No such luck - I realized I was scheduled to work from 10 am to 9 pm that day.
And then, when I got to work that day, I realized I was mistakenly scheduled to work only until 6 pm. Perhaps it is true what people say - that when you want something and work hard to achieve, certain forces in nature seems to be on yourside to make sure you succeed. I was able to attend the concert after all, and I will be joining them for the next set of rehearsals in one week. Now I just have to decide whether I'll play the violin or the cello.
So besides music, my other projects now include tennis (I've started taking lessons to improve), acting (my improv class is the one thing I look forward to the most every week), script writing, and studying French, which definitely will suffer a bit away from Paris. Sometimes I do one thing then later wonder if I really did it or just dreamed it.
It doesn't make a difference, I just enjoy it all.
It has been exactly one month since I returned from Paris to San Francisco, and already it feels like months ago when I was in the city of "metro, boulot, dodo" (metro, work, sleep). Every now and then I wonder if I actually lived in Paris for two months, had pastries for breakfast nearly everyday, explored the streets of Paris with a camera and an absorbing mind, and travelled to the Provence and the Alps for some unforgettable adventures.
I questioned this particularly when I got on the scale upon my return and realized I lost five pounds while in Paris. Yes, recognize your jealousy and move on. But losing five pounds after two months of French dining, pastries, and ice cream! Must have been all that walking.
The way I see it, Paris was really a launching pad for the next phase. The little gray cells began to churn, and daydreams began to mix with reality. One of the things that happened during my last week in Paris has led to an exciting new project which will commence in one week.
The one thing that I miss the most of all the activities that I used to do when younger is performing in a music ensemble. This may come as a surprise to some, but there is a performer inside of me that's waiting to leap out and prance about on any stage to relive the old days of orchestras, marching bands, and choruses. On one of my last days in Paris, I saw a flyer for a concert by the Paris Rainbow Symphony Orchestra. I thought it would be fun to attend, especially since they were playing some great pieces, but unfortunately the concert had already happened the night before. Disappointed, I scanned down to the bottom of the flyer where I saw the words "in affiliation with the San Francisco Bay Area Rainbow Symphony." Now that was a surprise. I didn't even know that such a symphony existed in Frisco!
As soon as I returned to SF on June 3, I searched online for the ensemble. To my delight, their very first concert was going to be June 8 at 7 pm. The timing was perfect! I'll go to the concert, check them out, then join them to unleash the performer in me that has been dormant for the past 15 years. No such luck - I realized I was scheduled to work from 10 am to 9 pm that day.
And then, when I got to work that day, I realized I was mistakenly scheduled to work only until 6 pm. Perhaps it is true what people say - that when you want something and work hard to achieve, certain forces in nature seems to be on yourside to make sure you succeed. I was able to attend the concert after all, and I will be joining them for the next set of rehearsals in one week. Now I just have to decide whether I'll play the violin or the cello.
So besides music, my other projects now include tennis (I've started taking lessons to improve), acting (my improv class is the one thing I look forward to the most every week), script writing, and studying French, which definitely will suffer a bit away from Paris. Sometimes I do one thing then later wonder if I really did it or just dreamed it.
It doesn't make a difference, I just enjoy it all.
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